Men Not Doing Enough Housework? Why Not?

That's it! On 6 Jun 2010, the Sunday Times ran an article on "Who Cleans the house?" Inevitably, although the opening statement was on Singaporean women being spoilt princesses, the actual grouse was really on the men, who were notoriously known for abhorring or avoiding household chores.

So what is it about household chores for which almost everyone deems it as but an necessary evil and avoid them like a plaque? It took me almost 15 years to comprehend and eventually embrace them after we were rendered "maid-less" in April last year. OK, there were intermissions where I was engage in household chores, but those were no more than 3 to 4 months before relief came in the form of another maid.

But after last year's maid disaster, the Wife and I decided that we shall adopt the DIY approach. Surprisingly, having labored for over a year overcome the inertia, I actually like cleaning the floor and doing the ironing. In fact, if I were so much as to skip a week - overseas trip or just occupied with some other engagements over the weekend, I would really feel uneasy; almost akin to that of missing going to church. So, why the sudden, no, eventual attitude change? I tell you - it's actually all in the state of the Mind.

First a few posers for all my friends out there. OK, we are creatures of paradoxes: We have no qualms spending time, money and effort to search for and acquire our dream house (spending like 1 to 2 Million SGD, chalking up some loans along the way!); brainstorming and even to the extent of arguing how it should eventually be transformed into an enviable entity - to our friends and relatives. Then after when all the show-and-tell hype ("Wow, your house so nice"; "it's breath-taking, functional and awesome!") and adoration subsided, then reality starts to bite ... in the name of 'Maintenance' Then usually, the arduous task of keeping the House in a reasonably good shape would rest of the shoulders of our spouse. Ditto for the beautiful clothes we buy to spruce our (yourself and the rest of the family members) images. So we throng the shopping malls, splurging hundreds, if not thousands of dollars on these garments. But when it comes to cleaning them ... well, we push the responsibility to somebody else - again, more often than not, the wife's, if not the maid.

I would like to proposition that many of us perceive household chores as mundane and even boring indeed, since this is a perpetually repetitive affair. Especially, for those of us who would like to envisage our time should be better spent on other pursuits that are more worthwhile (eg going to the golf range to improve our swing and thereby, our handicap; being a chauffeur to our children as we transport them from 1 enrichment class to another. Never knew a kid who has not at least been subjected to music lessons before or has learned the finer points of abacus usage). Naturally, as we saw in our earlier days how our mothers or even grandmothers slough in the family, either they or ourselves resolve that we should do away with these tasks. That we have the other (cheaper?) option of engaging a maid to complete these tasks added impetus to our cause.